


It Was Always You

by eternalbane



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst with a Happy Ending, Developing Relationship, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Eventual Romance, F/F, F/M, First Kiss, Fluff and Angst, Getting Together, Light Angst, M/M, Mutual Pining, Oblivious Magnus Bane, Original Character(s), Roommates, Slow Burn, Supportive Isabelle Lightwood, Texting
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-10-20
Updated: 2019-01-29
Packaged: 2019-08-05 01:26:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 10,089
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16357997
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eternalbane/pseuds/eternalbane
Summary: Magnus and Alec are best friends and roommates at NYU. Alec has had feelings for Magnus ever since they met but hasn't ever acted on them. When Alec comes back from travelling over the summer he finds out everything has changed. Will he lose Magnus as a best friend?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Before I start, this is based off of my au that I wrote on my twitter. I hope y'all enjoy it!

LA.

It was Alec's favourite place. Except for New York of course. Los Angeles was one of his favourite places he'd ever travelled to; everyone was so friendly and there was so much to do. It was so peaceful compared to the bustling city he had grown to love. Yes it was busy, obviously, but it wasn't like New York.

New York was full of people. No matter what time of day it was, what season it was, it was always busy. Christmas and New Year's was the worst, it's the time everyone decides to visit, so it's definitely his least favourite time to be a student there. Yet it was home, and he wouldn't change it for the world. But sometimes he needed a break from it all. A break from everything that happened there. But it was still home.

And he missed home. A lot.

Over the years New York has become his home. It was like a home away from home. He had everything he could ever want. He had an amazing group of friends and was sharing a dorm with his best friend at the college he'd wanted to go to since he was 6. And he was finally able to travel the world, which had been a dream of his for the longest time. He had everything he'd wanted since he was younger, and it made the bad things seem so small. 

And he was surrounded by his friends. God he loved his friends. Magnus, Clary, Simon, Raphael and even Izzy, his adorable yet slightly annoying younger sister, who no matter what she was doing, he still loved her dearly. He was so grateful for them. He couldn't ask for a better group of friends to spend every day with.

Yet there was one issue. And that was Magnus.

Now Magnus himself wasn't an issue, of course not. He was the most perfect person he had ever met. Magnus truly was the greatest person he'd ever met and he made Alec a better person. Alec really loved Magnus.

Now that was the issue.

When he met Magnus, he knew he looked at him differently to the way he looked at his other friends. And it didn't take him long to realise how he actually felt towards Magnus. He knew it was wrong. He couldn't have feelings for his best friend; it wouldn't be fair on Magnus because he knew he didn't feel the same. But he couldn't help it. He tried so hard not to fall for him. He really did. And that's what made it worse.

He noticed himself picking out all the things he loved about Magnus: his soft, dark brown hair, his warm, brown eyes and the way he snored softly when he fell asleep while they were watching a movie together.

Luckily Magnus didn't know. And he could never find out. He couldn't lose the only best friend he'd ever had. He'd always struggled to make friends but with Magnus it felt natural. And he couldn't lose that.

So when his sister found out about his feelings for Magnus, he knew he was fucked.

* * *

_"Okay Alec don't bullshit me, do you have feelings for Magnus?" Izzy said bluntly, sitting down next to Alec, who was sat on his bed scrolling through his phone._

_He sat in shock, unable to reply, "Wh-"_

_"Alec" She interrupted, meeting his eyes "I care about you and want you to be happy, but you can't lie to me"_

_"Izzy, what do you want me to tell you" He replied, standing up and moving towards the window._

_"The truth, Alec" She said softly, "I don't want you to get hurt"_

_He sighed, looking out the window at the amazing view of the city he was lucky enough to share with his best friend._

_"Okay fine" He sighed again "Yes"_

_Izzy stood up and walked towards him "Yes what?"_

_He looked down at her "Yes I have feelings for Magnus"_

_She grinned, and wrapped her arms around her brother, pulling him in for a hug._

_"I'm so proud of you" She whispered in his ear._

_He put his arms around her "Thank you"_

That was a few months ago. Now he was in Los Angeles, away from everyone.

And he missed them more than ever.

* * *

 **Alec:** Hey guys

 **Simon:** Alec!!

 **Clary:** Hey Alec!!

 **Magnus:** How's LA?

 **Alec:** Really good actually, but not as good as New York

 **Simon:** Yeah, New York is the best

 **Izzy:** When are you coming back?

 **Alec:** A few weeks, just before the semester starts again

 **Clary:** We miss you!!

 **Alec** I miss you guys too

 **Izzy** See you soon big bro

* * *

Alec's favourite part of LA was the sunset. Every night he took a walk to the beach and sat on the warm sand admiring the gorgeous view that sat on the horizon, leaving a purple tinge to the sky. He found himself sat in the same place he was when he first arrived, on a small arrangement of rocks far away from the main part of the beach, where he went when he first felt homesick. The place where he sobbed to himself, feeling pathetic that he couldn't travel by himself.

And now it was three months later and so much had happened since that moment.

Alec had always suffered from anxiety. For as long as he could remember actually. And for the first time since he was 4 he finally felt proud of himself. He finally felt like he'd made steps to true happiness and to live his truth. And he wouldn't have done it if he hadn't had booked the flight to LA at 1am, with the persuasion of Magnus of course, who had sat next to him the whole time, telling him that he was could do it, he just needed to believe himself.

And for the first time, he agreed with Magnus.

He was gonna miss LA so much. He only had just over a week left of being in LA before he flew back to New York and he didn't want to leave. Of course he missed New York, he loved it there, but Los Angeles was like a whole different city. The place that made him believe in himself. He knew it sounded pathetic, but he was so proud of himself, and he had Magnus to thank for it.

As he walked through the city he thought out how much he actually missed his friends, especially Magnus. He just wanted to see him again. Magnus always knew how to cheer him up when he was struggling and always knows how to make him laugh. He was the human representation of pure happiness and always wanted the people around him to be happy. And that's what Alec loves about Magnus

Likes, not loves.

Obviously he knew he could never have Magnus, because you can't always get what you want. But he did just want to spend time with him.

He knew it was insane. However he just couldn't stop thinking about him.

It's pathetic, Magnus is his best friend and wouldn't ever feel the same.

But he couldn't help it. And it hurt. 

A lot.

* * *

He pushed open the door of his apartment, before collapsing onto the sofa and switching on the TV, throwing his keys onto the coffee table and kicking his shoes to somewhere in the room, he wasn't bothered. He flicked through the channels, unable to concentrate on the shows that were on. He didn't care.

His eyes gazed around the room at the suitcases he'd left there a month ago. He shrugged his shoulders, switching off the TV and sinking into the grey sofa and the throw pillows that surrounded him.

Beside him his phone buzzed against his leg. He glanced down to see multiple messages from Simon and Clary and sighed.

_[Clary changed the groupchat name to 'Girls + Alec']_

**Simon:** Why am I a girl??!

 **Clary:** Hello to you too Simon

 **Simon:** I hate you

 **Clary:** Love you too Si

 **Alec:** Hey guys, what's with the new groupchat?

 **Izzy:** Alec...

 **Alec:** What?

 **Alec:** What's going on?

 **Clary:** There's something you have to know

 **Clary:** It's about Magnus

 **Alec:** Oh God is he okay?

 **Izzy:** Yeah he's fine, don't worry

 **Alec:** Then what's wrong?

 **Simon:** He's dating Camille, Alec

 **Izzy:** I'm so sorry Alec

 **Clary:** Are you okay?

 **Alec:** Yeah, why wouldn't I be?

 **Izzy:** Alec...

 **Alec:** Seriously guys I'm fine

 **Simon:** Are you sure?

 **Clary:** We're here for you Alec

 **Alec:** I appreciate it, but for the last time, I'm fine

He switched off his phone and stared at the TV, but was unable to listen to anything that was happening

He really wasn't fine, and he hurt so much.

* * *

A week later and he found himself back at the airport. It was early and he had reluctantly dragged himself out of his apartment for the final time, repeating in his head over and over again, the text messages he'd received a week ago. 

Magnus was dating Camille, and not Alec.

He didn't want to go home. He couldn't face Magnus. And he felt awful about it. Magnus hadn't done anything, he was just acting jealous and it wasn't Magnus' fault. All he wanted was Magnus. To be able to call him his own. It was cheesy, he knew that, but he really couldn't help it. He just wanted to be with Magnus.

Alec had always had an issue with dealing with jealousy. He didn't handle it well and he was such a terrible person when he was jealous because knew it wasn't him. And when it came to Magnus he became very overprotective, so he jealousy skyrocketed when it came to anything to do with him. And because they were only friends, he really struggled with it.

So he knew he wouldn't be able to face Magnus, yet he missed him and wanted to see him. He was so conflicted and didn't know what to feel.

_The flight to New York will be boarding in 10 minutes_

But at least he was going home again.

Right?


	2. Chapter 2

By the time Alec got home it was nearly 3pm.

He stepped off the flight with a sigh before walking down to the baggage claim, waiting a while before retrieving his luggage and making his way to the cabs. While in Los Angeles he'd gotten a text from his parents that they'd dropped his things off at the university so he headed there first.

He watched the city he'd missed pass him by. Shops lined up the streets, shopkeepers advertising their new autumn range even though it was September. People queuing outside restaurants, determined to get a seat, others getting bored and leaving. Buildings towered over the traffic below, each person going their own way, living their own life. And Alec was doing the same.

The cab turned the corner and the campus he'd become to love came into vision. Trees surrounded the buildings and students walked round the campus, talking to their friends. Alec picked out the couples from the single people, it was easy really. As he pulled up outside his dorm, he stopped as he saw a familiar face walking towards the cab.

Izzy.

Alec stepped out of the cab, only just having enough time to put his luggage on the floor before Izzy threw herself at him, quickly wrapping her arms around him, Clary following behind her, a huge smile on her face.

"Alec!" Izzy smiled, pulling away from the hug. "How was your trip, I missed you!"

"Wow, okay hi Izzy" He laughed. "Oh the trip was amazing, Los Angeles gets better every time I visit"

Clary cleared her throat "Hey Alec"

"Hey Fray" Alec grinned. "Any of you seen Magnus?"

"I think he's out, I haven't seen him all day" She replied "If I see him, I'll tell him you're looking for him"

He nodded at her with gratitude before heading up to his shared dorm.

* * *

Alec threw open the door, being greeted by a pile of boxes on one side of the bed, his side of the room.

Magnus' on the other hand had already been packed away, everything in drawers and on shelves, his laptop closed shut on his bed. At least he was here.

Alec sighed, putting his luggage by the door and reaching into his pocket to retrieve his phone before putting his music on and beginning to unpack his things. This was definitely the worst part about the first day of the semester, but he wanted it done and he had to do it.

He hummed to the music, picking up things from boxes and placing them in drawers, on shelves, and the joint bathroom. 

Magnus' side of the bathroom had been neatly put together, his things, including the shampoo Alec loved but wouldn't admit it, was placed in a basket on the shelf above the sink. Next to it there was an empty basket with a note inside.

_Thought you might need a place for your things,_ _Magnus x_

Alec smiled, he'd missed that dork so much.

He packed away for about another 30 minutes before he heard a knock at the door. He sighed, before pausing his music and dragging his exhausted body towards the door, opening it and being greeted by his younger sister who had changed into a grey baggy hoodie and ripped jeans.

"Hey Alec" She grinned, walking past him and going to sit on Magnus' bed, watching Alec walk around his room, putting various items in different drawers.

"What's up Izzy?" He asked, folding a pair of blue jeans into the draw and kicking it shut. He'd had enough of unpacking already.

"Alec, are you okay?" She asked, ignoring Alec's question, staring contently at her sibling.

"I'm fine, why wouldn't I be?" He said, without looking towards her.

"Alec, don't play dumb with me" Izzy said

He threw some random cables into a draw. "What would I be upset about?"

"What about the fact that Magnus is dating Camille"

Alec paused, turning to face his sister. "What?"

"Alec, it's okay not to be okay about all of this" She said "It makes sense to be upset"

"But I'm not upset" He replied, walking back over to the collection of boxes that were in the corner of his room.

"Alec-"

"Izzy" Alec interrupted "I get you're worried about me and I appreciate it, but trust me I'm fine"

"Are you sure?" Izzy questioned, slowly giving up on her brother"

"Yes" He said "Thank you though"

* * *

A few hours later everyone, including Magnus, met up at the coffee shop on campus. They sank down into the sofa chairs, Alec sitting on the sofa, with Magnus putting himself next to him, their knees touching. Alec's skin felt on fire, Magnus' touch did that to him. On the sofa opposite Simon and Raphael sat next to them, Raphael draping an arm around Simon's shoulders, pulling him closer to him. 

Alec smiled. He wanted that.

Izzy and Clary sat on the chairs, both scrolling through their phones, slowing sipping at their coffee. Alec fiddled with the hem of his t-shirt, unsure about what to say, especially to Magnus, who he had barely spoken to since they'd seen each other except for a quiet _Hey _when they all met up. He didn't know why he was being so awkward around Magnus, but he knew he didn't want it to last.__

He wanted to go back to the way things used to be between them. The way Magnus used to subconsciously flirt with him which would make him blush, or the small touches that left Alec wanting more. He wanted more.

He wanted Magnus.

Beside him Izzy put her phone and coffee onto the table "You guys coming out tonight?"

Clary looked up "Obviously"

"Me and Simon are" Raphael said, rubbing his hand against Simon's bicep.

Simon looked up at his boyfriend "Are we now?"

Izzy turned to her brother "Alec, you coming?"

"I've got so much work to do"

"Come on Alec" Clary said, turning to face him.

"Please" Izzy pleaded.

"Guys..." Alec trailed off.

"Alec, please come with us" Magnus said, making eye contact with Alec.

"Magnus?" Simon asked "You coming?" 

Magnus teared his eyes away from Alec "Only if Alec is, I'm not gonna leave him by himself"

"Magnus" Magnus turned back to Alec

"Alec"

"I'll be fine by myself" He smiled "You guys have fun"

Izzy sighed "No Alec, come on please"

"No Izzy" He replied.

"Please Alec" Magnus pleaded.

Alec didn't reply but kept looking at Magnus. He felt so bad, but he couldn't go with him. Magnus turned away from Alec, looking down at his lap.

"Alec?" Simon asked.

He still didn't reply.

"No then" Clary spoke up, picking up her phone again

"Fine" Alec said "I'll go"

Magnus looked up and turned to Alec. Alec nodded at him, making him smile. God he loved Magnus, he was so cute.

* * *

Alec threw on a blue checked shirt, before walking out of the bathroom and sitting down on the bed, watching Magnus apply sparkly eyeliner. His eyes walked down Magnus' body, appreciating the older male. 

Magnus was wearing a red shirt, the first three buttons open, showing some of Magnus' unreal abs and had layered a few necklaces as well. Over the shirt he was wearing a black jacket, the shoulder pads glistening with a few gems that he'd put on himself last semester because he thought the jacket was _too plain._ He had matching black jeans, the side of the leg lined with more jewels. And he had black tailored shoes, which Alec knew were his favourite.

Alec loved Magnus' style, it was so unique and really represented the true Magnus Bane. He was one of the only people on campus who stayed true to himself and it was one of the many things Alec loved about Magnus.

He'd given up denying it now, it was true. He was in love with Magnus and there was nothing he could do about it.

"Alec?" Magnus said "Izzy's waiting for us"

He looked up at Magnus, who was waiting by the door "Sorry Mags, lets go"

Magnus steps closer to Alec "You need to stand up to do that"

"Really, I didn't know that" Alec grinned, allowing Magnus to pull him up off the bed and towards the door.

They walked towards the cab waiting for them outside, their hands brushing against each other. Alec resisted the urge to slip his hand into Magnus' by quickly putting his hands into his pockets. When they reached the taxi they were greeted by Simon and Clary, who had both dressed up for the night out and were laughing together. Simon nudged Clary as he noticed the two males arriving.

"Hey guys, you ready to go?" Simon asked, opening the cab door for Clary, who smiled as she stepped in.

Alec and Magnus climbed into the cab behind Clary, the three of them squashed into the back as they watched Simon climb into the front seat and tell the cab driver where they were going. The cab started to move and they made their way to the club.

Simon was sat talking to the cab driver about music while Clary, Magnus and Alec were sat in silence, with Clary texting Izzy, and Alec staring quietly out the window. Alec watched the city whizz by them, the lights leading the way through, the way to Pandemonium where Izzy and Raphael were waiting.

Magnus' knee bumping against Alec's, making him shiver. Alec looked over at Magnus who grinned at him, watching Alec as if he knew what each small touch was doing to him. As if he knew how Alec truly felt.

Holy crap. Magnus knew.

* * *

They arrived at the club within 20 minutes, and Alec quickly scrambled out of the cab, needing some fresh air, away from Magnus and the truth.

He stood with Izzy, watching Simon step out of the car and immediately be greeted by Raphael with him wrapping his arms around the other male and pulling him in for a short, sweet kiss. 

He was so happy that they were finally together. He remembered all last year Raphael was pining over Simon, always wanted what he couldn't have, or at least what he thought he couldn't have. That was until one night Simon kissed Raphael and admitted that he'd been in love with him for months but was too afraid to say anything and wasn't sure that he would ever feel the same which made Raphael admit that he'd felt the same but didn't think he'd ever feel the same.

Alec knew how Raphael felt, it really hurts knowing the man you love doesn't feel the same way. Except it ended up that Simon felt the same way Raphael did, whereas Magnus was dating Camille and obviously didn't feel the same way.

Speaking of Magnus, he watched him walk up to another cab and open the door, which only left Alec confused. Until he saw who stepped out of the cab in a long red dress and dark eye makeup.

Camille.

* * *

Alec stood in the club, surrounded by, Izzy, Clary, Raphael and Simon, who were almost as confused as Alec was.

"What the hell" Izzy said, looking over in the direction of Magnus and Camille, who were wrapped around each other.

Clary spoke up "I can't believe this"

"Alec?" 

"Yeah" Alec looked over at his sister.

"What is happening" Simon asked

"Why is Camille here" Clary questioned, following the gaze of Izzy.

Alec sighed "He invited her"

Everyone turned their heads to him.

Clary was the first to speak "What?"

"Magnus, he invited her earlier, they're dating remember?" Alec replied, sitting down.

"Alec.." Izzy started.

"Why didn't you tell us?" Simon asked.

Alec looked up at them. " Why do you think?"

"Alec, I understand this is hard for you" Clary said.

"I don't know why it should be. Magnus is dating Camille, not me." Alec said "I need to accept that and move on"

Izzy sat down next to Alec and wrapped an arm around him "You've been hung up on him for years, are you sure you can just move on?"

"Well I'm gonna have to, he doesn't like me Izzy, he likes Camille, probably even loves her" Alec said. "Look I'm gonna go back to my dorm, I'll see you tomorrow"

Alec stood up and started to make his way to the club exit.

"Breakfast tomorrow" Izzy called out.

Alec looked behind him and nodded.

He needed a break. He couldn't do this anymore.


	3. Chapter 3

Alec slowly awoke, groaning as the sun blinded him, which peered out from behind the blinds.

He suddenly remembered that he had to meet his younger sister in 15 minutes and clambered out of bed, throwing on a t-shirt and jeans. Alec sprinted round his dorm, attempting to find his wallet and keys while struggling to put his shoes on. The dorm seemed quiet, too quiet at that. He sighed before pausing, quickly turning to his right and realising that something was missing. Someone was missing. Magnus was missing. 

Alec stood, looking over at Magnus' side of the room, which was untouched and cold. Magnus had obviously slept over at Camille's, possibly trying to avoid Alec. It would make sense. Alec had been trying to avoid Magnus anyway, especially since he found out he was dating Camille, because he didn't want to face the truth, but wanted to talk to Magnus about everything that was happening in his life. He wanted to tell Magnus the truth, to explain to him how he felt and why he left for three months. But he couldn't because Magnus was dating Camille and obviously didn't feel the same. In the past he'd had so many opportunities to tell Magnus how he truly felt, how he'd been in love with him since they met two years ago, and that all he wanted was Magnus. 

* * *

_"Alexander" Magnus flopped down on the bed next to the younger male, a huge grin on his face._

_Alec looked over at Magnus, who was sitting way too close to Alec to be considered friendly._

_"What's up Mags" Alec asked "You alright?"_

_Magnus nodded, leaning in closer towards Alec, resting his head on the other male's shoulder, watching him quickly type on his laptop._

_"I love you Alec"_

_Alec immediately stopped typing, turning to face Magnus. "What?"_

_"I love you" Magnus repeated, grinning._

_"You love me?" Alec questioned, making eye contact with the older male, his heart pounding._

_Magnus leaned in closer, the feeling on his breath on Alec's neck "Of course I do, you're my best friend"_

_Alec's heart dropped "Oh.. yeah, I love you too Magnus"_

_Magnus smiled, kissing Alec on the cheek and hopping off the bed, making his way to the door "I'll see you later" ___

_"Bye Magnus" Alec mumbled, watching the door close behind the older male._

_Alec placed his hand where Magnus had left a kiss. His skin was on fire. He broke down into tears_

_Why couldn't he just tell him the truth?"_

* * *

Every time Alec thought back to that moment, he hated himself even more for the way he acted. He wished he'd had the courage to tell him earlier because now he couldn't because he'd ruin his friendship with Magnus and destroy the relationship Magnus had with Camille.

He jumped when his phone rang, seeing his sister's photo pop up on the screen. He sighed and left his dorm room, sprinting down the corridor to greet his sister. She was stood leaning up against a tree, arms crossed against her chest, the wind blowing her black hair across her face.

Alec sent her an apologetic look before they both walked side by side, towards the cafe that sat on the edge of the campus. They found a seat outside just as a young waiter came over to their table and asked for their order. He not-so-subtly checked out Izzy before turning back into the cafe, leaving Alec pissed off and Izzy exasperated. But it wasn't long before he was back with their orders and quickly walked away as soon as the final plate touched the table, slightly afraid of what Alec would do if he stayed any longer.

The siblings laughed as they watched the waiter leave.

Izzy was the first to speak. "Alright start talking"

"There's not much to talk about Izzy" He replied, taking a sip of his coffee.

"Not much to talk about?" Izzy repeated "You realise you have feelings for your best friend, run away to LA for three months then when you find out he's dating someone else, you pretend you don't have feelings for him"

"Izzy..." Alec started.

Izzy looked up at him. "What"

"I'm sorry, I should've told you about this" He said "Okay, so just because I'm in love with Magnus doesn't mean I'm not okay"

Alec paused and made eye contact with his sister who sat there in shock.

"In love?" She questioned, placing a hand on Alec's.

"Yes Izzy, I love him." Alec started, staring at the empty cup in front of him.

"I love him more than words can describe because every time I see him it hurts" Alec continued. "Okay, yes, it's selfish but all I want is him. I want him to be mine but he will never will be because he doesn't see me that way-"

"Alec..." Izzy said, stroking her thumb against Alec's hand, trying to stop him from crying.

Alec took a heavy breath before continuing "But I'm okay with that, I'll get over. It'll take time but I'll get over it because that's what's best. I don't want to lose him as my best friend just because of something stupid like this"

"Alec I didn't realise you felt this way" Izzy said "You should've told me, I'm your sister, I'm here for you"

Alec started to get choked up but took another breath. "Thanks Izzy, but this is something I need to deal with myself"

* * *

Alec walked back to his dorm, leaving his sister at the coffee shop. He felt bad for leaving her but he knew she'd understand. He needed some time to himself, to process what he'd just admitted to his sister. Obviously he knew that Izzy knew Alec had feelings for Magnus, but she didn't know he was in love with him. To admit it, Alec wasn't sure about it until he saw Magnus dancing with Camille. It was at that moment that Alec realised he was hopelessly in love with his best friend and there was no denying that. 

As he walked through the busy streets, he passed the large row of cars queuing outside his dorm. Alec sighed, morning traffic. He easily passed the traffic before quickly running up the stairs his shared dorm room. He took out the keys from his back pocket and unlocked the door, kicking it shut behind him before flopping onto his bed.

"Hey" A familiar voice calmly spoke.

"Magnus" He breathed "Hey"

Magnus sat down on the edge of the bed "How was breakfast?"

"Really good" Alec lied "You need to go there"

Magnus grinned before moving to sit next to Alec "Anyway, can we talk?"

Alec sat, facing his best friend "About what?"

"Alec you've been really distant and I'm worried" Magnus started "Have I done something to upset you. I can try and switch rooms if you don't want me as a roommate anymore and if you don't like me then then fine-"

"Magnus!" Alec said, placing a hand on Magnus's knee.

"Yeah?" Magnus looked down at Alec's hand then made eye contact with him.

"I don't hate you" Alec reassured "And you can't leave me"

"I never would" Magnus grinned.

Alec grabbed his laptop off his desk and opened it up before quickly typing in his password and loading up Netflix, with Magnus telling him what to put on. Alec put on what he wanted. As long as he was happy.

Magnus shuffled closer to Alec, his knees brushing against Alec's and rested his head on the other male's shoulder, focusing on the movie they were watching.

Everything was back to normal.

At least Alec hoped it was.

* * *

When Alec woke up, he found himself curled up next to a warm body, who had their arms wrapped around his waist and their head buried into the crook of Alec's neck, snoring softly. From that he knew exactly who it was.

Magnus.

Alec started to panic, unsure how the older male would react if he found them like this. He turned to face the clock which read _3:37_ and slowly tried to untangle himself from Magnus's grasp until he realised they'd fallen asleep on Alec's bed. It would be impossible to put Magnus into his own bed without him waking up so Alec was unsure as to what to do.

After he'd untangled himself from Magnus, he paced around the room as to what to do, until he had no other choice.

Alec quickly got changed into something more comfy and wrapped a blanket around Magnus' sleeping body before climbing into Magnus' bed and laying down under the duvet. He felt guilty sleeping in Magnus' bed but didn't want to disrupt his sleeping best friend, so he left him be. Alec swiftly fell asleep, lulled to sleep by the sweet aroma of Magnus' shampoo which lingered on his pillow.

* * *

It was only a few hours later that Magnus woke up, rubbing his eyes and scanning the room, feeling confused and unsure. When he realised he had fallen asleep on Alec's bed, he shot up, unsure about how to continue. He look over to his bed to see Alec curled up around one of Magnus' pillows, quietly snoring, making Magnus smile at the dork before him.

God he'd missed him so much.

At that point, he knew he needed someone to talk to so he immediately put himself in a groupchat with his friends, except for Alec, and started typing words into the keyboard, hoping it all made sense

 **Magnus:** Okay, what's happening with Alec

 **Clary:** What do you mean?

 **Magnus:** I mean why is he so distant

 **Izzy:** Ask him yourself, you are his best friend

 **Magnus:** You don't think I already thought of that

 **Magnus:** He just said that everything was fine

 **Clary:** And you believe him?

 **Magnus:** Yeah

 **Simon:** For fuck's sake Magnus

 **Izzy:** Look, if you want I can talk some sense into him and get him to open up if that's what you want

 **Magnus:** Thanks, but I just want him to tell me if he's upset, I'm his best friend for gods sake

 **Raphael:** Give him time, you know what he's like"

 **Magnus:** Thanks guys

 **Magnus:** I'm gonna go see Camille, I'll see you later

* * *

Alec woke up and the realisation of the night settled in. He found himself wrapped around a pillow. His best friend's pillow. In his best friend's bed. 

He slowly sat up, scanning the room, his eyes falling onto his bed, where the blanket that once lay across Magnus' body, dangled off the side of the bed, no longer covering the other male, who had obviously left. 

Alec suddenly started to panic, as he realised that Magnus had seen him asleep in his bed, clasping his pillow tightly. He didn't know how Magnus would react to it, but he worried that it may have freaked him out, which was why he was no longer there. 

Okay so maybe he was overthinking it, but he still worried about where Magnus was.

Alec let go of the pillow, which he was still holding, and clambered out of bed, stumbling to the bathroom. He closed the door behind him before turning on the shower and stepping in, not before taking his clothes off, obviously. He allowed the hot water to run down his body, which soothed him, as he leaned against the wall. He didn't waste too much time after that, and had a brisk shower before wrapping a towel around his shaking body and sitting on the cold tile.

He knew that he'd have to eventually talk to Magnus about what had happened the night before but didn't know how he'd bring it up to the older male. Alec had always struggled to confront people, and Magnus had helped him through it. But since Magnus was involved, he knew it would be hard.

Alec quickly threw on a hoodie and jeans and made his way back into the main dorm room, walking over to his desk and finding a small note.

_Gone to see Camille, be back soon_  
_Magnus x_

It was then that Alec realised he had a lot to think about.

* * *

 **Magnus:** Hey guys

 **Clary:** Hey Magnus

 **Izzy:** Heyyyyy

 **Magnus:** Do you guys want to come round to the dorm on Wednesday and study?

 **Alec:** I can't

 **Izzy:** Huh?

 **Magnus:** What do you mean, you live there

 **Alec:** I can't

 **Simon:** Why?

 **Alec:** I'm going away...

 **Magnus:** WHAT

 **Clary:** When?

 **Alec:** Tomorrow...

 **Magnus:** WHAT

 **Izzy:** Magnus calm

 **Magnus:** What the hell Alec

 **Alec:** I'm sorry, I should've told you

 **Magnus:** You think?

 **Raphael:** Where are you going?

 **Alec:** Italy

 **Magnus:** Wow

 **Alec:** Magnus...

 **Magnus:** I've gotta go

Alec put his phone on his bedside table and started to sob.

He fucked up.

Again.


	4. Chapter 4

It was much later when Alec heard a knock at his door.

He pulled himself on his bed and dragged his exhausted body towards the door before opening it. He opened it and his sister swiftly pushed past him and sat on the bed. Alec kicked the door shut and crossed his arms across his chest, watching his sister with curiosity. 

Izzy was sat, crossed legged on her brother's bed, waiting for him to say something. Except he didn't, he just stood, watching.

"Okay" Izzy sighed "What the hell Alec?" She watched her brother closely, waiting for an answer.

Alec looked down at his feet "I'm sorry"

"Why didn't you tell us" She asked "Let alone Magnus" She was beginning to get frustrated at her brother's stupidity. 

"I don't know!" Alec protested, his arms flinging up on the air, looking at his sister with sadness.

"Is this about the whole Camille thing?" Izzy asked, watching her brother, who had sat down at his desk, his head in his hands. "Is this because of her, because if this is then you need to talk to Magnus."

Alec looked up "What, no!"

"Sure" Izzy mumbled, looking down at her feet before looking back up at Alec "Anyway, when will you be back?"

"December" Alec said, trying not to make eye contact with his sibling.

"What, that's nearly two months!" Izzy said, standing up, staring at her brother with slight anger.

Alec sighed "I know I'm sorry Izzy" He felt so guilty, but he knew he had to go.

Izzy walked towards her brother "What about Uni?" She asked, placing a hand on Alec's arms, which were crossed against his chest.

"Its part of the course" Alec said, pulling away and dragging his suitcase out from the closet before placing it on his bed with a thud.

"What about Magnus?

Alec stopped and turned to his sister "What do you mean?" He glared at his sister with confusion as he watched her step closer to him.

"Don't play dumb with me" Izzy said, crossing her arms, exasperated by her brother.

Alec sighed "Look, I love Magnus I really do, but I need some time away from it all. I'm so sorry I didn't tell you but this is something I need to do""

Izzy wrapped her arms around her brother, pulling him in for a hug "I love you" she whispered into his ear, comforting her heartbroken brother.

"I love you too"

* * *

The day Alec left for Italy came round quickly and before he knew it he was stood in the middle of the dorm, surrounded by his friends and his luggage, his sister sobbing. Izzy was sat on the bed crying with Clary next to her, an arm wrapped around her. She always cried when Alec left, and Clary always comforted her.

Today was different though. He was leaving to go to Italy so that he wouldn't have to see Camille and Magnus together. And it make Alec feel so selfish. He knew that he shouldn't escape the truth but he couldn't help it.

He dropped his bags and wrapped his arms around his sister tightly, Izzy burying her face into her brother's shoulder.

"I'm sorry" Alec whispered to his younger sister, who gripped him tighter. He knew that he'd upset his sister, admitting to her that he's in love with his best friend then leaving for two months does that to someone.

"It's okay" She sobbed, her tears soaking onto her brother's jacket "I understand"

Alec pulled away. "I love you"

"I love you too"

Alec went back and picked up his luggage, which was scattered on the shared dorm's floor. Magnus watched him closely, studying the taller boy with confusion.

Alec made eye contact with Magnus who gave him a small nod. He looked sadly at his roommate as he made his way to the door. Izzy jumped up and leapt at him, hugged her brother again before he left. She whispered something in his ear before pulling away and walking back over to Clary, who wrapped her arms around the sobbing girl, rubbing her back in comfort.

Alec turned to look at his friends once more, making eye contact with Magnus one last time. "Thank you" 

And he closed the door behind him.

* * *

The taxi ride to the airport was awful. Alec couldn't stop thinking about his sister's reaction to him leaving. And the words she whispered to him kept repeating round his brain.

_Magnus loves you_

Alec couldn't believe her. He knew Magnus loved him, obviously, but not in the way he wanted. And that hurt him, of course it did. But instead of confronting his problems, he'd decided to walk away from them, or fly away in this case. All the way to Italy, which was over 4,000 miles away from everything, and from everyone. He'd always struggled with confrontation, and today was no exception.

It was hard leaving everything behind, he couldn't deny that. But he knew that he couldn't be around Camille or Magnus. Which was so unfair because they hadn't done anything, it was just Alec's jealousy taking over his emotions. And Magnus didn't deserve this because he was the sweetest person, he cared so much about other people, especially when it came to Alec. So leaving obviously didn't make Magnus happy because he cared about Alec, but he still supported it.

* * *

_"Alexander?" Magnus asked, as he walked into their dorm, just an hour after Alec had told him he was leaving for Italy. "So you're off to Italy?" He continued, making his way to his roommate, who was curled up on his bed, leaning up against the wall._

_Alec sighed, closing his laptop and placing it next to him "Yeah" He said bluntly as he watched Magnus sit on the edge of the bed._

_Alec watched Magnus with a confused look before the other male spoke up "Why?"_

_"I don't feel like sharing, but there are reasons" Alec said, watching Magnus' reaction as he scooted closer to Alec._

_"Okay" Magnus replied, wrapping an arm around Alec's shoulders, looking at the taller man with a grin "As long as this is what you want"_

_Alec nodded, grinning at Magnus. He was so blessed to have a best friend like Magnus, someone who didn't pressure him to open up about his feelings and someone who cared about him._

_"Thank you Magnus"_

_Magnus continued to grin "No problem Alexander"_

* * *

And then the rain started to pour. _Typical_ Alec thought, staring out the window.

He'd only been away for a few hours and he already missed them. Magnus mostly, closely followed by his sister, who he knew would miss him too. Alec couldn't stop thinking about them, how much he'd upset his sister. He had never meant to, because this was what he wanted. But he knew that made him selfish, but he didn't need to be, because this was his life.

Alec sighed, his head hitting the back of the taxi seat with exasperation. He couldn't please everyone and that's what sucked. He put too much pressure on himself to please everyone, which Magnus had gratefully pointed out multiple times since they'd moved in together. Except he didn't disagree. It was exhausting and he hated it.

"Sir?"

Alec snapped out of his trance and looked up to see that they'd arrived at the airport and were sat in the taxi bay, waiting for Alec to get out.

"Sorry" He said, quickly grabbing his wallet from out of the pocket of his black jeans and handing the money to the taxi driver with a smile "Thank you" 

Not wanting to waist more time, Alec started to scramble out of the taxi before quickly grabbing his luggage from the trunk of the taxi and walking into the warm airport.

He was about to head to Italy.

And he couldn't be more scared.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry this update took forever and that it's so short, i've been so busy with school.


	5. Chapter 5

Waking up in Italy was like waking up in another universe. And Alec loved it.

It had taken him a few days to settle in and calm his anxiety but now he was a month into his trip and he couldn't be happier. 

Italy was so different to New York. Obviously. But it was the best place Alec could've gone. Everyone was so polite and were very patient towards Alec, due to his little knowledge of the language but his determination to learn it. And the surroundings were mesmerising. Every morning Alec was able to look out of his window and see the view of the beach that lay on the horizon. It was such a peaceful way to start the day, and he couldn't be more blessed to have had the opportunity to go.

Right now Alec was laying in bed, leisurely scrolling through his phone, checking his social media and the anecdotes his friends were up to at home. He checked the weather, emailed his professor back and texted a few people who were in his class and were on the course he was on. Until his phone started to ring.

_Magnus_

Alec looked at his phone in shock, and confusion, before swiping the answer button and putting it up to his ear.

_Hey Alec, how's Italy?_

"Magnus" Alec exhaled, grinning.

_Yeah?_

"How are you" Alec couldn't stop smiling

_I'm good Alexander, but how's Italy?_

"It's really good actually. It's so peaceful compared to New York and the people are so nice"

_Well I'm glad you're enjoying yourself_

Alec giggled "How's it back home" He asked.

_It's good, not much has changed but it's been quiet. Everyone's been busy with exams so we haven't seen each other much_

_We miss you though_

_I miss you_

"Magnus.." Alec trailed off, tears starting to form in his eyes.

_When are you coming back_

Alec sighed "December"

_What?_

Alec felt the tears fall down his face "I'm sorry, I should've told you, of all people you deserved to know"

_Okay_

"Okay?" Alec questioned, straightening up.

_Okay_

Alec went quiet.

_"Look I'm gonna miss you, I already do, but you're my best friend, and if this is what you want then I'll support you"_

"Thank you, honestly thank you" Alec sobbed "I'm gonna miss you though"

_I'll miss you too Alexander, see you in December_

The phone went dead and Alec threw his phone onto the mattress. Had he made a mistake coming to Italy? Surely not, this was what he wanted to do. He wanted to be here. It had been his decision to come here in the first place, no one had forced him to. If anything they had tried to persuade him not to go. And yet he did.

He dragged himself out of bed, across the tiled floor and towards the window before opening the blinds and looking out towards the beach ahead. Alec smiled sadly. He loved it here, he really did.

_I miss you ___

And that was all he could think about.

* * *

Magnus sat crossed legged on his bed, furiously typing on his computer when all his friends arrived. They piled into his and Alec's dorm, before Izzy and Clary flopped down onto Alec's empty bed, giggling softly. Simon walked over to the desk next to Magnus' bed and sat down on the chair, sighing as he watched Magnus type.

They all sat in peace, doing their own thing, the girls texting other friends and Raphael wrapping his arms around his boyfriend's neck, whispering things into his ear, which made Simon smile.

Clary was the first to speak, as usual.

"You guys want to go out for food?" She asked, scanning the room.

Izzy nudged her "Sure"

"I think I can" Simon said, Raphael nodding in agreement.

"Magnus?"

Magnus looked up from his laptop to see Izzy watching him, waiting for an answer.

"Yeah?" He asked, oblivious to what they were talking about.

"You coming?" She asked, grinning.

"I don't know" He started, fiddling with the hem of his shirt. "I promised Camille I would spend some time with her"

"Invite her" Clary said, making Raphael and Simon glare at her. She just shrugged and turned back to Magnus.

"You sure" He asked, knowing full well they didn't like her.

She grinned and nodded at the older male who continued to type on his computer "Yeah that's fine"

"Wait, I have an essay but I can come afterwards" Raphael said.

Izzy nodded "Okay, we'll meet at 2pm"

Everyone in the room nodded and continued with what they were doing.

Eventually they all filed out, Raphael being the first to leave, heading off to the library in a hurry, not before kissing Simon passionately, earning them a wolf whistle from Izzy, which made Clary giggle and Simon glare at them. Clary and Simon left next, since they had the same class next and didn't want to be late, leaving Izzy sat on her brother's bed, watching Magnus still.

"I'm excited to see Camille again" She spoke up, making Magnus stare at her with confusion.

She realised his reaction before continuing "I mean it Magnus, she can be nice you know, I don't hate her"

Magnus smiled and nodded "She really isn't as bad as everyone makes her out to be, she's just misjudged"

Izzy grinned, smiling and jumped off the bed. She quickly placed a friendly kiss on Magnus' cheek, and picked up her purse, which had been laying in the middle of the floor for the most part of an hour.

"See you later Magnus"

Magnus looked up and waved, before continuing with his essay. He knew Izzy was lying about liking Camille but also knew she was trying to be nice to him. This was mainly due to the fact that she knew Magnus was struggling, because of Alec being gone and was trying to cheer him up. He was grateful for that, and was another reason he loved his friends so much.

He just hoped Camille wouldn't find out the full reason as to why Magnus missed Alec so much.

* * *

Alec had been out exploring Italy all day. Meeting locals, eating the local cuisine and taking photos to send back to his professor. He only had a few weeks left in Italy and he couldn't believe how fast time had gone. 

It was nearly December, and even though he missed his home and friends, especially Magnus, he never wanted to leave. When he had first arrived, he hated it, mostly because it wasn't familiar to him, and he didn't enjoy it.

Ever since he was four, Alec had struggled in new places, whether that was school or home, he hated new places. It always took him time to adapt, especially when he moved to New York. Which was why he was so grateful for Magnus, who had helped him through the first few months of living in New York, even though they barely knew each other. But now, it was 2 years later and he was in a new place, without the comfort of Magnus to help him.

Yet he was okay, at least he thought he was. He was in a new, unfamiliar place and he was okay, happy in fact. And he loved every minute of it.

Eventually Alec reached his apartment, which was exactly the same time his phone started to go off, being spammed with texts from his sister and his friends. He sighed, watching the messages fly into his phone as he sank into the sofa he had made his way to.

 **Izzy:** Alright Raphael, what do you know

 **Alec:** What's going on?

 **Izzy:** Raphael knows something about Camille and Magnus' relationship but won't say

 **Clary:** Come on Raphael, if anyone deserves to know it's Alec

 **Alec:** Raph?

 **Clary:** Please Raphael

 **Raphael:** Do you really want to know 

**Alec:** Obviously

 **Raphael:** Are you sure?

 **Simon:** Babe just tell us

 **Raphael:** Okay fine

 **Raphael:** Camille thinks Magnus is cheating on her

 **Alec:** Oh

 **Raphael:** With Alec...

Alec shot up in his seat and threw his phone across the room, which landed next to the chair in the corner of the room. He was in shock, and didn't know what to do.

Why would Camille think Magnus is cheating on her, with Alec?

And how could Alec use this to break them up?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hopefully going to try to regularly update but don't hate me if it doesn't happen


	6. Chapter 6

Alec knew that if he wanted to be with Magnus, Camille would have to be out of the picture. Which, he realised, very quickly, that this would be hard, especially since he was 4000 miles away from home, which was where Camille and Magnus were. Together.

For weeks before he left Italy, Alec had decided on how he wanted to tell Magnus about his feelings, hoping that it would make him change his mind about Camille, evenn though he knew that wa selfish. He just couldn't help it. However plans changed, and Alec found himself in a situation in which he had never expected to be in.

It was a week and a half before Alec left for New York, when he had decided to go back to one of his favourite restaurants which served, in his opinion, the best Italian food. He didn't want too much because he was still hurting, due to the Magnus and Camille issue, and had already decided to eat his feelings for the second night in a row, with the ice cream he had purchased a few hours before.

That was until he heard a voice call his name from across the room.

"Alec Lightwood?"

Alec quickly turned in his chair, only to be facing a tall, dark haired and handsome man, who he was sure he recognised, but wasn't sure why.

The dark haired man walked closer towards Alec and stood next to the confused man before laughing.

"I'm Tom. I'm in your class back at NYU." He explained "Sorry to scare you, it's been weird not seeing anyone I know in a country I don't know, so it was nice seeing someone I know from back home"

"Yeah I understand that, it's comforting" Alec grinned at Tom who nodded in agreement "Want to sit down, I was just about to order food"

"If that's okay, I don't want to be intrusive on your night out" Tom said, before sitting down in the chair opposite the younger male.

"Of course it's okay, plus I haven't got anything planned for tonight, I was just going to go back to my apartment and eat my way through a tub of ice cream"

Tom laughed.

"No seriously" Alec sighed "It's been a long few weeks for me"

"Well maybe I can give you some company" Tom smirked, grinning at Alec, who looked slightly intimidated.

Then Alec was the one to laugh.

* * *

Eventually their friendship led to a relationship, which lasted for the week and a half they had left in Italy. So when Tom announced hat he would be leaving to go back to New York with Alec, he couldn't be happier.

For the first time in 6 months, Alec was genuinely happy and had a boyfriend who he knew he loved, even though they had only been dating for just over a week.

The only issue was Magnus.

He hadn't spoken to Magnus in weeks, and definitely hadn't mentioned his relationship with Tom to him. The truth was, Alec was still confused about his feelings for Magnus, and now Tom was in the picture, it only made it more confusing.

"You ready to go"

Alec felt his boyfriend intertwine his fingers with Alec's.

"Yeah I am" Alec grinned, looking down at their hands; this felt right.

Together they walked out of Alec''s apartment for the final time and hopped into a taxi which was waiting for them outside to take the couple to the airport.

The journey to the airport wasn't too long, but waiting for the flight was the worst.

Alec had always hated airports, especially going through security. It had always been something that had stressed him out but every time he was at one, Magnus would stand close to him and whisper in Alec's ear that everything would be okay and that it would be over before he knew it.

As they reached security, Alec felt himself start to loose his breath and his body started to shake. This couldn't be happening, he couldn't do this, especially not in front of Tom. If Tom realised that Alec was about to have a panic attack over something as stupid as airport security, he would definitely break up with him immediately, and Alec wasn't sure that he could handle that right now.

"Hey Alec I'll be back in a minute" Tom said before kissing the younger man on the cheek.

Alec nodded and watched his boyfriend leave. He was alone, about to get into the security line.

Alec knew there was only one thing he wanted.

He whipped out his phone and dialled Magnus' number.

_Alec?_

"Magnus" Alec's breath quickened at the sound of Magnus' raspy voice. He clearly had only just woken up.

_You okay Alexander?_

Alec didn't hold back "Magnus help"

_Alec what's wrong?_

"I..think.."Alec couldn't breathe.

_Okay Alec, I understand okay, don't worry, just try to take big breaths and focus on my voice_

Alec listened carefully as Magnus talked him through his panic attack.

_Alec, you're going to be okay, you can do this, I just wish I was there with you to help_

Alec smiled slightly "I love you" he whispered, still trying to steady his breathing.

_I love you too Alexander, you're my best friend, I'm always going to be here for you_

"Alec?" Tom said as he approached Alec, who was still shaking.

_Alec who's that?_

" A friend" Alec said bluntly "Thank you Magnus, I feel so much better"

_Are you sure, I'll talk to you for as long as you need me to_

"Thank you Magnus" Alec replied, straightening up "I'll see you soon"

_Okay, bye Alexander_

Alec hung up the phone and looked over at his boyfriend, who was confused and concerned.

"Alec what's wrong?" Tom asked, wrapping his arms around Alec's torso, who pulled away slightly "Who were you talking to?"

"Magnus" Alec said "He's my roommate back in New York"

"What did he have to say?"

"Not much" Alec shrugged "He was just asking when I'd be home"

"Okay, is that it?" Tom asked.

Alec nodded " Let's go"

Tom nodded and followed Alec towards the security line. Alec felt his heart rate increase slightly but remembered the words Magnus had said to him. He took a breath and stepped into the queue.

He'd see Magnus soon. But soon wasn't close enough.

* * *

Magnus lay on his bed, book in his hand, while Raphael and Simon were wrapped around each other, resting their exhausted bodies on each other.

"Really?" Clary asked, as she walked into Magnus' dorm and stared at the couple in disbelief.

"What?" Simon asked defensively "We had planned to spend night together watching movies but Izzy texted us saying we all had to meet her here"

Magnus placed the book next to him "Why here though?"

"Cause it's the biggest dorm" Clary smirked, throwing her coat at Simon and Raphael before sitting down in Alec's abandoned desk chair, which hadn't moved since he left a few months prior.

The four of them sat in peace for a few moments before the door swung open and Izzy appeared in the doorway, a huge grin on her face.

"Guys" She shouted, throwing herself onto the end of Magnus' bed, facing her friends, two of which were still wrapped around each other.

"Izzy" Clary grinned, watching her in excitement.

"Have you seen?"

"Yes!"

"Same here" Raphael said, the girls turning to face him, while he just shrugged it off and interlocked his fingers with Simon's.

"What is happening" Simon asked "I can't believe him"

"He deserves it" Magnus said, while everyone turned to face him, in shock.

Raphael was the first to speak "What?"

"He deserves to have someone" Magnus continued, which was greeted by a confused stare from Clary "Guys come on, he's the only one out of us who isn't in a relationship"

"What about Izzy or Clary?" Simon questioned.

Clary and Izzy looked at each other "Oh"

"Wait what?" Raphael asked, looking at his boyfriend in confusion, who shrugged.

Magnus stared at Raphael "How did you not know?"

Izzy spoke up "Guys we're forgetting that Alec has a boyfriend"

"And that you have a girlfriend" Magnus smirked.

"Does anyone know who it is?" Simon asked.

"Clary"

Simon shook his head "No who's dating Alec"

"Wait what?" Raphael looked shocked.

"Babe come on" Simon said exasperated, giggling slightly, before burying his head in the crook of his boyfriend's neck.

"Look" Magnus started "Hopefully we'll find out who Alexander is dating when they arrive later"

Clary nodded "Yeah lets hope that we do"

Magnus turned back to his book, attempting to focus his mind on the characters he was reading about.

But all he could think about was Alec and his boyfriend.

He didn't want to meet Alec's new boyfriend.

Because he wished that _he_ was Alec's new boyfriend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry i haven't updated in a while, i've been so busy with school and had an exam to take at the beginning of the year so i hd to study for that.


End file.
